Tuesday, January 25, 2011

On hold with the IRS

You might find it hard to believe. I have been married to David Letterman and Tom Sizemore. Yep. You may have missed it on the news. Also, when I got pregnant, the doctor thought it would be best to artificially impregnate my 53 year old mother so she could be a surrogate. Ya know... so I could have twins again?

Many thanks go out to Celebrity Rehab and Big Love. Because if I hadn't fallen asleep watching these shows, my pregnancy dreams might actually be normal. Not sure were Letterman comes in at. Probably because he likes the non -makeup wearing, slightly chubby gals. Which, is how I am feeling nowadays. I wake in the morning feeling these dreams are completely true, so real.  David Letterman and Tom Sizemore...Really?  Maybe I should watch re-runs of Saved By the Bell. The problem would be if Mr Belding and Screech made it into my dreams. Eeek.

Please note, in my normal( as normal as it gets) awake state, I do NOT pine over Letterman or Sizemore.  

Just sayn'


Since I don't have a bouncer guarding the entrance to my head. Bottom line, I need to fall asleep to better programing. I am scared to watch EWTN before bed. I cant control my silly mind at night, so lets keep the priests and nuns out of my active imagination for now.

Reality TV.. in today- out tomorrow. What happened to all of those shows about the trials of the tanning industry? Blow Out with Jonathan Anton. So funny. Where did that go? Flipping Out-ehhh OK. Can you tell I watch Bravo too much. The all- time family fav every week WIPE OUT. So incredibly stupid and mindless. Just perfect tv. Sometimes that's just what you need. So, with that mindless POST, I'm Seacrest OUT.

Side note-- I have turned on the oven to cook dinner. Only to find that somehow I turned it off. Dinner time has taken hours at our house. I AM LOSING MY MIND!